More Money Than Sense (Naked City)

It’s no secret that Donald Trump has probably tripled his wealth during his time in the now gaudily gold gilded Oval Office. Many of his acolytes have reaped a similar reward and 2026 looms as a year when the rich will get even richer, whilst poverty spreads like a plague of RFK Jr’s measles. That’s the story in the good old USA but it appears the way of the world, Australia included.

One of the indicators that some people, i.e. the filthy rich, have more money than sense, are the absurdly high prices paid for certain works of ‘art’. It’s just after a year ago that a piece of conceptual art featuring a single banana duct-taped to a wall, and titled ‘Comedian’, sold for $6.5 million (US) at a New York auction. The buyer didn’t even get to take the nana home, instead receiving a certificate of authenticity allowing them to tape one to the wall at home and call it ‘Comedian’.

Imagine how many actual bananas and food in general the sale price could buy to feed starving masses all around the globe.

When it comes to works of art, it’s often a case of beauty is in the eye of the beholder – the holder of the biggest cheque book that is. Very occasionally the original critics of what appears a grossly overpriced purchase are made to eat humble pie, years and years later. In the mid-1950s Fred and Florence Olsen bought a painting called ‘Blue Poles’ from a then rather unfashionable artist called Jackson Pollock. In 1973 the National Gallery in Canberra forked out $1.3 million for the giant artwork, creating an enormous stink at the time. It was not only the abstract style of the painting that created controversy but the huge purchase price at the time. Today ‘Blue Poles’ is conservatively valued at around $500 million. Whether Albo flogs it off to put a deposit on a nuclear sub remains to be seen.

If the item is unique and one of a kind, like the last violin supposedly played on the Titanic, there is always a cashed up somebody prepared to make it their own.

The violin might make a nice display item if donated to a museum but what would you do with the humourless Queen Victoria’s sized 45-inch undies which sold in 2015 for $16,300 (US). Maybe if you were into historical cross dressing the royal bloomers might have a certain allure. Likewise, you have to ask what was the attraction of writer Truman Capote’s ashes which fetched $45,500 from an anonymous buyer in 2016. The perfect fertilizer for your cactus garden?

Music and movie memorabilia also tend to bring silly prices, particularly when the musician or actor has left the building (like poor old Elvis). Notoriety and even tragedy tends to inflate the value and that was certainly the case when Kurt Cobain’s ‘MTV Unplugged’ Martin D-18E guitar sold for over $6 million in 2020, some six years after his untimely death. You have to wonder what the enduring value will be. In a hundred years’ time, when the word ‘grunge’ has almost disappeared from the English lingo, and the memory of Kurt long gone, will his guitar end up at the local church jumble sale?

There are millions worldwide waiting for Attila the Venezuela-invading Trump to die, all with great anticipation, but when he finally does, will his stalwart MAGA supporters go crazy for his memorabilia. The Trump name, removed from the Kennedy Centre could easily end up on ‘Pawn Stars’, and who knows what a set of saucy photos previously redacted in the Epstein files could bring if flogged to Porn Hub.

In the interests of good hygiene, let’s not see a bag full of his used diapers go up for auction but a couple of gallons of his hideous fake tan could be sold as household weed killer. Then again, his size 45-inch bloomers might well be snapped up by a MAGA fan looking to go fancy dress as Queen Victoria. Anything is possible when it comes to Trump!

The big item coming for auction in Australia at the end of the month is another of the baggy green caps that once belonged to the legendary cricketer Donald Bradman. Even though there are said to be eleven in existence this one is tipped to bring somewhere around the $1million mark. So far, the record price for a celebrated baggy green, one owned by Shane Warne, is $1,007,500. The cap was auctioned with proceeds going to emergency services involved in the services 2019-20 bushfires.

In the meantime, Pauline Hanson has released a video complaining about the high cost of supermarket shopping bags which she claims are too flimsy. Regardless of their sturdiness maybe she should consider donning one over her head, rather than a burqa when she pulls her next attention drawing stunt in parliament. It could well end up on eBay a few weeks later with a starting price of 25 cents!