THE NAKED CITY: POPPA’S GOT A BRAND NEW SHOWBAG
Image: Leslie, Kevin, Nora and Marie Fisher hold their showbags - Minties, Mickey Mouse and Cadbury. SHOWBAGS 1938. Credit: City of Sydney Archives
When the Royal Easter Show was moved from Moore Park to Homebush in 1998, many predicted that it would never be the same again. After all it had occupied its original site for some 116 years and history is seldom successfully transplanted. For many older readers memories of the Pygmy Revue and freak shows at sideshow alley, “Nigger Boy” liquorice bags and chariot races in the main arena will far surpass any recollection of smelly livestock or the massive displays of fruit and veg in the district exhibits.
These days, sideshow alley is virtually non existent and freak shows are well and truly forbidden; the emphasis is very much on family entertainment. Fair Trading inspectors now carefully scrutinise the 350 odd showbags that go on sale, checking for things like chocking hazards and projectiles that could take out an eye.
Back in the ‘50s and ‘60s the showbags were largely associated with confectionary and what kid didn’t want a packet of chocolate cigarettes. As the trains pulled out of Central Station it was not uncommon to see the more cashed up families struggling to lug a dozen or more of the sugary lolly packed bags home. Maybe this was the start of Australia’s current obesity epidemic as youngsters, already stuffed with fairy floss and dagwood dogs sucked on Minties and Hoadley’s Violet Crumble bars.
In 2023 you can still buy showbags laden with sugar and fat but the more desirable items are offerings such as the “Harry Potter Activity Pack”, “The Hot Wheels Monster Truck Bag” and the eco-friendly “Conscious Store” which contains bamboo toothbrushes, a glass water bottle, a lunch box, and an organic shopping bag – oh dear, give me a packet of milk chocolate fags any day!
If we are to have showbags that push a social, environmental or political message I’d like to see a whole new range of additions in 2023, admittedly many of them restricted to adults only. Here are just a few suggestions:
The Mark Latham Wash Your Mouth Out Bag: Comes with a bottle of Listerine, a Club X bondage gag and a t-shirt showing Pauline Hanson with the exclamation ‘Please Explain’.
The Donald Trump Indictment Bag: You get a copy of Stormy Daniel’s book, Full Disclosure, a tin of creamed mushrooms (read the book and you’ll get the joke), a CD of the incarcerated January 6 choir singing “The Star Spangled Banner”, a “Make America Groan Again” cap and a giant whoopee cushion made to the exact dimensions of Donald Trump’s arse.
The Nick Cave Permanent Angst Bag: Complete with a bottle of black hair dye, a large packet of Allen’s Black Cats, a copy of Self Flagellation For Dummies and a packet of thumb tacks to sprinkle throughout your bed prior to bedtime.
The Q-Anon Bag: A plastic Jacob Hansley (aka Shaman Q) headdress, a Fox News bumper sticker, a “Where We Go One, We Go All” t-shirt, and a $20 voucher redeemable for a pizza with the lot at Comet Ping Pong in Washington DC (the home of ‘pizzagate’).
The Monarchists Never Die Bag: For those still with a strong affection for the British Royal Family – you get a “Prince Andrew – NO SWEAT” headband, a Prince Harry dressed as a Nazi t-towel, a copy of the saucy “Camillagate” tapes, and a toilet seat cover displaying King Charles in his most absurd ceremonial attire.
The Vive la République Bag: Comes with a cute plastic guillotine, a CD single of Motorhead singing “Eat The Rich”, a dozen eggs for the nest Royal tour and a roll of toilet paper displaying King Charles in his most absurd ceremonial attire.
And finally:
The Politically Incorrect – Remember The Bad Old Days Bag: Not intended to glorify the past but to put some of our former sins into a modern day perspective. Yes there’s a packet of chocolate ciggies and some of that infamous “N” word liquorice. Aspros and Bex were freely promoted at shows in the ‘50s and ‘60s and the bag contains branded sun visors for both. Just the pick up to dunk along with a milk arrowroot biscuit at the CWA tea rooms. There’s a pic of Queen Ubangi from the Pigmy Revue and the mother and son duo billed as the world’s fattest humans. The whole thing is topped off with a giant blob of sticky, gooey fairy floss. When you finally regurgitate everything edible within the bag, there’s even a bag within the bag – a sick bag!
