NAKED CITY: THE MONARCHY AND THE MEDIA

When the Queen died last week, some people were deeply saddened, some distraught, some indifferent and some almost jubilant. The latter emotion might well be that of hardcore republicans and those that believe that the perpetuation of the monarchy is the enemy of egalitarianism. Yet, everything suggests that there is nothing to celebrate when it comes to the possibility of the monarchy being abolished or losing favour under the buffoonish King Charles and his once vilified mistress.

The British monarchy will survive of course – not just in the UK but amongst its dwindling realms. It might be eventually rejected in the Caribbean but in Australia it could well grow even stronger. It has one massive supporter in its corner – the media! Witness the saturation of television, radio and mainstream newspapers with endless tributes and historical waffle that followed the death of the Queen – and continues to this day.

On Friday’s ABC News Breakfast for example, virtually all other news items were discarded for a non-stop focus on the Queen. Since then, ABC TV has embarked on an almost 24/7 coverage, bordering on absurdity – one that could only be surpassed by the second coming of Christ or a giant asteroid about to hit the planet. Needless to say, all the commercial stations followed suit, churning out a marathon of eulogies and grovelling praise that extended through day and night. Only the Friday night AFL and NRL footy at 7.00pm interrupted the bombardment, providing a merciful respite and proving that when it comes to sport, British pomp and glory comes a distant second.

The reason for all this?  Over the past twenty to thirty years the media has become so invested in the British royal family that any thought of its abolition sends them into fits of apoplexy. Whether it’s the daily soap opera of family dysfunction, the feel-good moments with William and Kate inserted into the six o’clock news, the scandals of sleazebag sex trafficker Prince Andrew or the shameless celebrity seeking of Harry and Meghan, ‘the family’ are ratings winners and gossip mag gold.

There seems to be some suggestion that the ascension of King Charles III will somehow devalue the monarchy and, in Australia’s case, give added strength to the republican movement. Nothing could be further from the truth. It’s clearly in the media’s interest to give the seventy-three-year-old a makeover and present him in an entirely new light, as the aging but venerable successor to his much-loved mother. Forget about his adulterous affair and his one-time kinky desire to be Camilla’s tampon (“Oh god. I’ll just live inside your trousers or something. It would be much easier!”). Both the Palace PR machine, the parasite-like ‘royal watchers’ and nearly all sections of the media will join forces to promote the previously questionable and often ridiculed pair in the best possible regal light.

Given the longevity of the royal family, there’s every indication Charles might rule well into his nineties and whilst the media would much prefer the infinitely more marketable William and Kate, they could be stuck with the two adulterers for another two decades. Whilst the Brits still support the monarchy, regardless of the many scandals and controversy that have beset the family, in an ever-changing Australia that devotion is hard to gauge.

Clearly many Australians of Anglo-Saxon heritage have a strong allegiance to the monarchy, but what if you are of Asian origin or come from a country like India that felt the brute force of British imperialism right up to 1947. Approximately fifty percent of Australians come from non Anglo-Saxon backgrounds and have no cultural connection with the British monarchy. And what if you are an indigenous Australian still feeling the oppression that began with British colonization in the late 1700s? How much of the wealth plundered from native lands has ended up in the coffers of the ultra-rich British monarchy?

Ironically, SBS, an Australian broadcaster established to promote multiculturalism and the interests of our many diverse communities, seems obsessed with programming an endless number of documentaries about the British royal family. Perhaps these are bargain bin pickups that help fill its budget cut schedule but given that the majority of its listeners have little connection with the monarchy, you have to wonder why?

Likewise, traditions certainly die hard at the ABC where the coverage of royal tours in the ‘50s and ‘60s was marked by hushed and reverent tones.  The ghosts of their once toffy nosed presenters probably still walk the corridors clutching their ridiculous MBE’s, with their current chair, Ita Buttrose only too familiar with the selling power of the royals in The Women’s Weekly, of which she was one time editor.

The majority of Australian media, be it television, radio, or print media, is both owned and programmed by Anglo-Saxons. They may not have much interest in the political and constitutional significance of our ties with the monarchy but they are both indoctrinated with and committed to its cultural connection.

Finally, some praise to last Saturday’s Sydney Morning Herald which chose to print its twenty-four-page tribute to the Queen as an easily disposable wrap around. Mine went straight to the kitty litter tray allowing me to enjoy the rest of the world news monarchy free!