Logies or Bogeys? (Naked City)

Logies or Bogeys? is the latest column (July 14, 2025) from Coffin Ed‘s Naked City – exclusive to City Hub.

You might think that television was originally introduced in Australia in 1956 when TCN-9 in Sydney first began broadcasting in glorious black and white. Surprisingly television here began experimentally, way back in 1929, when a number of radio stations in Melbourne hosted some very early and some very basic transmissions.

We have certainly come a long way since the Nine Network’s Bruce Gyngell uttered the now immortal words “Good evening and welcome to television” at the start of their initial broadcast. Over the past six decades TV in this country has dished up what the title of a classic Italian spaghetti western best describes – “The Good, The Bad & The Ugly”. Many critics would argue that the bad and the ugly easily overshadow the good and even now we are inundated with the mediocre.

Nevertheless in a few weeks’ time the country will celebrate ‘excellence’ in local TV with the 65th TV Week Logie Awards – a ritual that dates back to 1960 when the original TV Week Awards morphed into the Logies. The actual title of the gongs was suggested by tonight show host Graham Kennedy in reference to John Logie Baird, the Scottish engineer who demonstrated the world’s first mechanical television system in 1926.

The exciting element of course, apart from the glittering awards ceremony, is that you the viewer get to vote in a variety of categories including Best Documentary, Best Current Affairs and Best Reality Program – all culminating in the most prized trophy of them all, the coveted Gold Logie for the most popular personality on Australian television.

Mercifully, unlike State and Federal elections, voting is not compulsory and just how many punters are enthused enough to cast their votes is not revealed. There are a limited number of nominations in all of the categories so there’s no chance of a wildcard vote for a possibly remorseful Andrew O’Keefe. Rumours have persisted for years that a surprisingly low number of votes are required to win the Gold Logie, not to mention irregularities like votes being cast from overseas. Who knows, ‘Dancing With The Stars’ could well be a massive underground watch in Turkmenistan!

If you are of the school that believes Australian free to air TV harbours more rubbish than the old Tempe Tip, then you might be wondering just why there is no avenue for you to express your democratic wrath – like nominating a list of the worst offenders. Flashback to the early 2000s and that forum of discontent did exist with the annual ‘Fugly Awards’.

The anti-gongs were the invention of Brisbane man Anthony Dever and recognised such categories as Worst TV Show, Worst Male Personality, Worst Female Personality and Most Biased Sporting Commentator. When the Logies ceremony regularly took place in Melbourne, Dever would roll out a tacky brown carpet on the footpath outside Crown Casino and announce the various dishonours to a group of absent recipients.

Dever was not afraid to target specific celebrities with Richard Wilkins and Eddie McGuire coming in for regular and at times rather savage ‘satire’. Eddie for example was nominated so often that ‘The Eddie’, awarded for the most over-exposed personality, was named in his honour. Others in the firing line included Kyle Sandilands, Kerri-Anne Kennerley, Daryl Somers, Bert Newton, Catriona Rowntree and Jackie O.

It was not all wham and damn as the Fuglies also recognised categories such as Most Under Acknowledged TV Personality, Most Under Acknowledged Television Show and The Australian Celebrity Who You Would Have Rather Seen In Celebrity Big Brother. I can vaguely remember voting in this category and nominating Chopper Read and George Pell.

Sadly the Fuglies were relatively short-lived. After seven years the joke probably wore a bit thin with Dever announcing “unfortunately, due to the global financial crisis, the backers of the annual anti-awards could not come up with the $130 it took to stage the event”. These days with social media and numerous internet discussions, there are a multitude of opportunities to call out the crap on Australian TV.

You might have noticed how eager many of the top rating programs have been in recent weeks to secure your vote, with regular reminders as their presenters sign off. It seems like people in the actual TV industry take the awards a lot more seriously than many of the punters at home.

When the 65th Logie Awards are televised on Sunday 3 August, perhaps the inclusion of a number of anti-gongs would spice up the normal predictability.

Here are just a few suggestions with the most likely winners:

Longest Infomercial Disguised As An Actual Program: Lego Masters
Variety Program Most Likely To Result In A Hiatus Hernia: Dancing With The Stars
The ‘Beef Wellington’ Award For Not Another Cooking Show: MasterChef
The Legalise Polygamy Award: Married At First Sight
And For the Ultra Competitive Gold Logie: Awarded posthumously to Mr Squiggle