Whaling Matilda

By Roger Hanney

In Madeira Portugal in late June, Sea Shepherd launched Operation Waltzing Matilda, its latest Antarctic mission to disrupt the Japanese whaling fleet. Coincidentally, the International Whaling Commission was holding its annual conference nearby.

International delegates were chased by Sea Shepherd activists wearing miniature inflatable boats and wielding styrofoam harpoons. Environment Minister Peter Garrett was harpooned, in the name of research, by landlocked mariners.

Speaking with great fondness for the Australian public, Sea Shepherd Captain Paul Watson declared: “Australians are the most passionate whale defenders on the planet. Operation Waltzing Matilda will reflect our gratitude to Australia for the incredible support we have received from the people of this wonderful nation since 2005.”

Flying colours depicting a rampant kangaroo wielding Neptune’s trident, and with a mostly-Australian crew, the Steve Irwin will sail from Fremantle in Western Australia in late December.

She will be accompanied by the ultra-futuristic biodiesel vessel, Earthrace, the New Zealand vessel that holds the current record for circumnavigation of the globe.

It has been reported that Kiwi owner Pete Bethune negotiated the use of his vessel because whaling “is happening in my backyard and it really pisses me off”.

Half a tonne of Kevlar will be added to the vessel’s hull to proof it against the Southern Ocean’s icy conditions.

Additionally, ships will be equipped with camera crews filming for the third season of the continuing reality show Whale Wars. And as conservative commentators prepare another flurry of press releases comparing the anti-whaling activists to terrorists and Somalian pirates, Watson maintains that Shepherd’s prime objective is merely to conduct research into non-lethal means of whale protection.

“Of course,” Watson clarified, “this may include research into Japanese ship’s hull plate thickness, vessel stress tests and paint chip analysis, as well as observation of whaler behavior in response to olfactory stimulation.”

For more, see www.seashepherd.org.