THE NAKED CITY – with Miss Death, Jay Katz and Coffin Ed

WHATEVER HAPPENED TO FUN DINING?

Masterchef, fine dining, food critics, celebrity chefs. Gordon Ramsay’s Kitchen Nightmares  and degustation menus – they’ve  all got a lot to answer for – especially when it comes to taking the fun and humour out of the local dining experience.

Whatever happened to those tacky theme restaurants where the quality of the food was very much incidental and the whole emphasis was on the theatre that accompanied it? Who could forget the immortal Dirty Dicks on Sydney’s North Shore where buxsom wenches served frothing mugs of beer and steaming plum pudding? Luckily ye olde night of medieval fun and feasting lives on as a kind of travelling road show working its way around the clubs and corporate gigs of NSW, but without a permanent home.

Back in the 70s and 80s, Sydney boasted many such eateries, from funky atmospheric coffee houses to el cheapo diners that boarded on the absurd. The Mars Bar in Sydney’s CBD was a true astronomical marvel, the walls adorned with galactic murals and the lighting designed to transport you (and your cappuccino) to a galaxy light years away.

Hidden away on the first floor of the Agincourt Hotel at Railway Square  was the Pinteresque experience known as the Bad Taste Café where patrons were seated on kiddie furniture complete with vinyl Mickey Mouse place mats and plastic tumblers. Punters were warned that the staff would be deliberately rude and the service the complete opposite of any gourmet pretence. The only problem with this short lived enterprise was that the waiting crew were either too nice to be genuinely nasty or lacked the acting skills to behave like a bad tempered waiter at some snotty nosed French restaurant.

Even the fast food industry has gone blander than bland when it comes to outfitting their takeway franchises. Long gone is the glossy chrome edged Happy Days décor of the 50s and 60s in favour of Gloria Jean style living rooms and dreary McCafe’s. America was once the home of the over the top, ridiculously themed, family restaurant and mercifully some of them still exist. Sadly few have ever way found their way to Australia to dot our highways and suburban malls.

In the 1980s traditional Dutch windmills could be seen alongside many of the interstates that criss crossed America. On closer examination they housed a hamburger franchise known as the Little Dutch Inn where waitresses hobbled around in clunky clogs and the Amsterdam with the Lot was the highlight of the menu. Imagine the thrill of coming across a roadside Aussie version (Dirty Dirk Hartog’s!), half way across the Nullabor!

Thankfully the Elvis Pizza restaurant lives on at Rushcutters Bay and the Grotto Capri at Kensington still provides that unique underwater experience but these days the emphasis is on fine rather than fun when it comes to dining out in Sydney.